After the powerful day of overcoming so many challenges each of us had faced and the healing of our sacred fire the night before we awoke to a glorious day.
Brigitta and Sandy filled the canyon with a joyful song welcoming the sun, as we all gathered together for breakfast. I had noticed that the simplest of foods that we would eat seemed to be the most delicious I had ever tasted. From the blueberry jelly and peanut butter sandwich to the blue corn mush with berries and the bean and cheese burritos, everything had a taste that seemed otherworldly. Was it the magick of the canyon, the culinary skills of our wondrous chef or was I just ravenous from the hikes and energy moving through me.
Whatever it was, this morning in particular, I felt very much alive and grateful to have the opportunity to walk upon the earth mother. I felt strong. I had so needed to sleep on the earth mother and to be in nature, to be away from the distortion of our modern conveniences and the chaos of our modern world. I also had a knowing that something was going to happen this day. There had been a reason why we had changed the days events around and would be going into the special canyon this morning.
The minute we entered the canyon, within seconds a large turkey vulture flew between the trees, closer than I have ever seen a winged one come, followed by two ravens that were chasing him through the trees into one side of the canyon. My animal allies were putting me on alert and I had a strange and uneasy feeling. Jon was going to take us to the ancient Anasazi ruins that remained on their family’s lands. I felt myself hesitating, going back and forth on whether I should climb to the ruins or remain behind. Interesting enough Guy announced he was staying behind as well as Marlis. The rest of us began to climb.
When we first came around the corner, we spotted a beautiful female deer who had taken notice that we were approaching and began to leap across the rocks to the other side of the canyon. Within a few minutes a second one appeared. My heart smiled as this animal ally teaches us to walk in beauty with compassion, gentleness and love. I felt we were blessed with the deer’s presence, but felt again something was going to happen. This was my second sign and a feeling of anxiousness now swept through my body. As I watched the deer, I didn’t notice a prickly bush that I walked right in to. It drew blood from my knee down to my ankle. The spirit world was asking for an offering of blood. This would be my third sign.
At the first level Sandy decided this was as far as she would go. At the second level Brigitta and I decided we too had gone as far as we wanted. The others continued to climb to the ruins. All of a sudden the turkey vulture, which is considered to carry the greatest medicine of the crow and raven family, flew across the canyon and sat on a rock directly above Marlis. Parallel to the rock we watched as one of the young deers began to run in an erratic movement. I gasped as I saw the deer try to climb the rock face. Both Brigitta and I could feel the deer was frightened and we decided we needed to go back down so the deer would calm down. At the same time, Jon, our Navajo guide also decided the others needed to turn back. He also felt the fear of the deer.
I had just jumped down to the next ledge when I heard Guy yell, “No, go back not that way!” as he called to the deer. Seconds later I heard the cry of Sandy, “Oh no!” Without seeing what had happened, I knew. My heart was now racing in my chest and I ran down the mountain afraid of what I would find. I saw Guy’s face and heard Sandy crying, “It’s our fault, we caused this”.
I ran to the lifeless body of the deer that had fallen from the rock face and burst into tears. Gina began to comfort Sandy and I felt my heart burst open as the tears came even more. “It is not our fault, it would have happened anyway” I heard Gina speak with great wisdom.
Jon approached and began to share with us the ways of his people. They believed that when a person or an animal ally passed, one had to be strong and shed no tears, as it was a sign of weakness and the animal needed to enter the spirit world with strength. He shared a story from deep within his heart about his own soul’s journey, that I knew in sharing the story was healing a memory within him as well. His story of sacrifice moved each of us at a deep level. As I sat on the ground next to the deer, I prayed for the spirit to run free and I acknowledged this animal ally had sacrificed itself for us. This was the way of the animal kingdom, this was the gift nature gave us. I felt the spirit of the deer, the gentleness, flow through me and asked that this spirit help me walk in beauty. In the animal beings passing we were being healed of the memory we each held inside of fearing we would fall if we tried to step into our full potential. Feeling we would fail in some way. I felt a huge healing in my heart and understood why Chyan had shared with me the day before I left her feelings. It was all perfect. It was our journey together and I had to heal myself, I had to be even stronger if I was going to weave the web of light to heal the sacred hoop and continue to awaken others. I sensed there was yet more to this story. No one knew the deep loss I felt as I was grieving now all the memories of my souls journey as flashes of other lifetimes moved before my closed eyes. I took a deep breath and felt a huge release. Jon also shared that the Navajo people believed that the spirit of everyone who had ever walked a path of beauty would return to the canyon and the deer’s spirit would now walk here as well joining with the others to keep the spirit of the canyon alive.
Lupita unaware of what had happened had moments before packed her medicine bag and was travelling out of the canyon with the family when she saw Jon at the side of the road as we were preparing to leave. She pulled over and Jon shared with her what had happened. She came with her family to join us and to share her wisdom. Together we would do a ceremony to honor the deer. She asked many questions. The first question she asked, was who was closest to the deer. It had been Guy. The message was for him she shared. We created a healing fire and again offered the medicine of the healing cedar plant and prayer to honor the animal and the gift.
Lupita looked up from the fire and shared in a quiet, knowing voice, “The prayer that we each had placed the night before as we gathered around the fire had been heard and answered”. She looked at Guy and said, “your grand daughter has been healed, the ancestors have answered”. In the world of the Navajo, one life is sacrificed for another. The world of nature had sacrificed the deer for the life of a human child. For me it was a powerful message that if we could all come together, if we could heal the pain of our past and honor the journey that had brought us to this place, we could heal the cosmic web and create the new dream. The power of prayer had been answered. We were the dream weavers and it was up to us. ALL OF US!
Even though we were deep within the canyon, and there was no cell service, somehow miraculously the next morning, one text came through. It was from our daughter. Our grand daughter had received a blood transfusion and the first dose of chemotherapy and was doing very well. Although I wanted to be able to offer alternative medicine, this was Tiffany’s journey and there was no doubt in my mind that this child would be healed. I knew Alyse was a special little girl and had come into this world to assist. I also knew the disease humankind had of fear and separation could also be healed. I felt such hope and strength in that moment.
We left this sacred place that belonged to the family. Lupita shared that this canyon where the gift of life had been given, was the place where something special always happened. We traveled now to Dog Rock to sit and be still to receive the wisdom of the stone beings and the knowledge of how to walk the path of Beauty that the shaman had shared with their students hundreds of years before. That night at the fire Lupita and her niece Vanessa would share more of the knowledge of their people. We each went to bed wondering what would happen our final day together as we would travel to Spider Rock to weave light, hope, courage and love into the web. We had all been transformed with the experiences of the last three days and were now ready to come together to do the work we had been called to do.
Join me tomorrow as I share the powerful experience with Spider Woman at the source of the cosmic web where we were all joined together as one light, one heart.
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